Momma is at it again – flirting with a stray cat that she promises me will be an Outside cat. Where did we hear that before – oh, yeah, Casey and it did not turn out well. He drove a little stake in Momma’s heart, creeping closer every day, until he reached the front door but even so, it was Momma (blame Momma) who actually carried him through that door to the horror of all the Indoor, Indoor / Outdoor Cats and me.
Oh why, oh why must this happen again? Is there a sign up down at the Cat Colony, Homeless Shelter for Stray Ferals, with a picture of Momma and arrows pointing the way to our house? Probably not. It is just when Momma realized that we had non paying guests seeking shelter in our garage, in the sub-zero winter weather, she did what all good hostesses do. She put out food. Now one of them for sure is a sibling to Casey, a luxurious striped tiger gray, wearing a white tuxedo shirt. But the stray who has the most staying power is a hard-headed tortoise shelled cat with tortitude, not willing to succumb an inch to the members of the Kitty Club Med. Me, he ignores, as if I am invisible, in his cat-i-tude world.
Oh why, oh why can Stray Cats not be like Roman Catholic Secular priests and nuns used to be, wearing far-reaching habits that would cover their frost-bitten ears, their matted fur and starving bodies with bones sticking out. That way, only their eyes would be revealed to show their desperation. (Ok, don’t freak, I know very few Orders still dress that way today). You know how Momma can not abide suffering, even for the ugly old slugs in the basement. I believe if Momma could not see what dire straights the strays were in, she would not go in to rescue mode.
Indoor, Indoor/Outdoor Cats, I promise we will do our best, trying to scare that stray back to the Colony but this one is clever and getting nervier – even with me barking annoyingly and Andy Cat hissing, snarling, and caterwauling, it is flipping its’ tail at us and standing his ground, like a Floridian we all heard about – showing up more often, waiting for his food and water bowl to be filled, biding his time while the glow from the pine, makes a fool out of me. Next thing you know, Momma will be setting up a comfortable place for him to sleep with a pillow and a heating pad, in the garage. Will she never learn?
PS: Andy Cat is so two-faced – I told you, I told you, dogs and cats are day and night. Here I am trying to run the stray off, using techniques Border Security employs between the United States and Mexico, (though I don’t have guns and detention lock-ups), thinking I have full feline support on my side. However, as Momma opened the door today to take me for my afternoon walk, there sat Andy Cat with the Stray Cat, like two steps from inside. There was no hissing, no snarling, just two cats, finding a patch of sun to snooze in.
I will be conducting a full investigation and filing a complaint with the Federation of Worldwide Registered Canines and Felines. We are not going to take it any more!
