Like the first night at an AA Meeting, I must confess. Hi, I’m Clem-Ka-Diddle-Hopper and I am Feral, by choice, not design.
Oh, I am so torn. It would be so easy, joining the Kitty Club Med, just being an Indoor / Outdoor Cat, eat a few kibbles, go outside, lay in the sun, hop on the bench, wait for Momma to open the door and leave me back in like dozens of times a day.
What is stopping me, you may ask? Momma and Wonder Boy fuss over you, every time they see you, feed you, stroke you, brush you. I have Diva Calico Gen wrapped around my grey and white Tabby paw-paw. Even Bad Boy Andy gives me the respect I deserve. He air kisses me when we meet up, either in or out doors. When I come in and he is at his food station, he saunters off, as if to say, ‘Hey Clem, help yourself.’ But the big one, really big one, is if I am asleep on a dining room chair, he will hop up on the chair beside me, and fall asleep which tells me an Ally Cat like Bad Boy Andy, trusts me.
Jakita, well she always respected me. I won’t go within a country mile of other dogs, but Jakita is Special. That leaves Charlie Cat, who skulks around, ready to hiss at the drop of a hat…well not at Jakita or Diva Calico Gen, although, she will extend her white-tipped calico paw and smack them across the face if she feels injured at something she perceives they did to her…Yet, she will let them be on Momma’s bed, on one condition…If Momma is there, Charlie is the only one allowed to be wedged against her. Law abiding as they are, Jakita and Diva Calico Gen put up no fight because they know, well Charlie is Charlie.
Who could walk away, tail in the air, when offered such cool accommodations? A wild cat, with responsibilities at the Cat Colony, that is who. Say what?? You must be having us on. You are feral, stray, homeless and you are worrying about your cat community. The world needs to know about you. Even the Two Footed are dismal at giving a hand up or a hand out to their own kind. Where did a Pussy Cat with a Conscious come from? You have got our attention. Tell us more.
Okay, I will…but ssshhh…keep it a secret…no broadcasting it because I don’t want Momma’s family thinking I don’t appreciate them. You want a Job Description, I will provide it. It’s not pretty, but it’s what I do, but never to Momma, Wonder Boy, our Special Jakita or the Kitty Club Med Gang. Trust me, there is more to tell. Like Arnold Schwarzenegger, ‘I’ll be back.’
I will let you decide if I should turn left or I should veer right or just follow the same path to gain Pet Paradise at the end of my days.
