♥ thy neighbour, as thyself… especially if you are an 80 pound weakling…like Momma.
It was a crazy month, December…it snowed, then it snowed some more, then just when you thought we had enough, well, it snowed again…Kept Momma hopping, even with a contractor that cleans out the driveway and shovels the walkways…
But then there are those noisy-good-for-nothing sidewalk plows, driven by the city clowns (so says Momma) whose one passion in life (it seems) is to cut up your front gardens, chewing and spewing bits of our brick hedges like a Pac-Man on speed…and if that is not enough , after your gateway has been ploughed….they are back…(like a poltergeist) heaving heavy slabs of ice in absolute mountains, blocking any chance of exiting with a car…until spring comes or Momma gets out her shovel.
One day, like a cowboy, Momma decided to take a chance, ride the wave, scale the mountain. It did not turn out well….because, how do I put this delicately…Momma is a woman driver. I mean, I, the Ultimate Earth Dog could probably have done it…but Momma…not so much…even with a fairly new car (well 2 years old but hardly driven) and top of the line winter snow tires. Momma got stuck…she could not go ahead, she could not go back, her goose was cooked and it was not even Christmas Day…and 7:00am…like who in their right mind is out and about at that ungodly time of day to help her?
Oh, but God is Good and Momma has no shame.
She’ll pray to the Virgin Mary and Sweet Baby Jesus, and if that doesn’t work, she’ll beg for help…that is the positive thing about being a female…we can suck it up, shake it off and never feel any the worse for it.
And so Momma went to our neighbour next door. He is a sweetheart says Momma…but alas a sleeping sweetheart…he either didn’t hear or didn’t answer because he did not feel like pushing another car this blankity-blank month.
Just then, across the street, in that house where we are not really sure what goes on (Momma sees everything)…We just know important looking men usher all manner of folks in to sign on the dotted line for high interest loans that banks refuse to give them because they are new to the country or single parents or high credit risks. Also ensconced in what is listed as a residential home so their taxes stay low, (hey, the city was told but they would rather fight with the residents than turn away any business, legit or fishy), is an apartment where a very young, beautiful couple live. The Little Lady, who has the beauty of an Angel, leaves the house at 7:00am everyday, hiho, hiho…it’s off to work she goes…she is as regimented as Momma, it seems. But Momma has talked to the Young Gent, who is what every Mother dreams her son will be…polite, friendly, helpful…the list goes on and on and on….so cool with all those tats and shiny earrings.
Like quick silver, Momma rushed over, explained her predicament and the Little Lady was very understanding (considering the number of times she had talked to Momma – Zero…but they had waved at each other, friendly like). In no time, the Young Gent was out and being a construction worker, cautioned Momma after surveying the situation, it would take some revving. Like, no worries, having grown up around 1st Cousin Buddy, Momma understood heavy-duty revving…Cousin Buddy revved motorcycles, snowmobiles, cars or anything with an engine, till it saw it his way and cooperated.
In no time the Young Gent had the car unstuck, told Momma, anytime…and was off…We are hoping that Momma learned her lesson but being a cousin to Buddy, we make no promises.
So…. Best Practise: ♥ thy neighbour, as thyself…because you never know when you might need them.
