October 5, 1981
Your Baby Cousin JAG, who would become your life long ally and collaborator was born today to my Sister-Who-Taught-Me-Most-of-the-Things-I-know. Your silly Daddy-To-Be was pea green with enough envy to choke him, while I was happy, happy, happy. It had to bode well for us, I reasoned, for no apparent reason.
October 6, 1981
The monthly curse arrives with a vengeance, dashing my fledgling optimism that heralded Cousin JAG’s arrival. No worries, I am booked to have a D&C in about six weeks time, so my state of fertility can be ascertained. I just know you are out there somewhere.
October 25, 1981
Early that Sunday morning, when the clocks fell back an hour, giving us another hour to kill before your Daddy-To-Be went out for coffee and donuts, you were conceived. I remember that day well because I actually did all the tricks the doctors advise (lingering in bed, legs elevated so sperm meets egg –I know, I know, too much information) before taking off like a whirling dervish, in order to get the list of things done, that keep me wake at night. I also remember some further trivia, I took a walk, across the street to the shopping mall, for therapeutic reasons only since no stores were open (before Sunday (gasp!) shopping). The weather was mild, though overcast with foggy patches. Little did we know what all that day would bring.
It was the day that our family unit expanded and then expanded some more, when the 2nd letter I wrote to the Toronto Star was printed. The family hiding your cousin, The Pretty Little Dutch Girl (Dad’s brother’s daughter) had a pique of conscience (or were they tired of feeding her, hiding her, worrying about her), so they contacted us. Arrangements were made that your Daddy would go to her friend’s house when The Pretty Little Dutch Girl was out, await her return and confront her. Bottom line, she came home with your Daddy and that is how you have a Big Cousin cum Sister all wrapped into one.
October 27, 1981
You are cozily ensconced in there but we don’t suspect a thing, as we go to meet up with The Pretty Little Dutch Girl’s Guidance???? Counsellor. “She is so smart”, Mrs. Warneck says (aka Mrs. No Neck – it appears her head has been plopped on her shoulders because she has no visible neck) ,”but how do we get her to come to school?” Ah, a rhetorical question that plagued us for both her, then you. I know, I know, Wonder Boy, you get bored easily, especially if you know more than the teacher.
October 31, 1981
It was your first (so to speak) Halloween – a cool, crisp, clear night with lots of star and star wars! Whatever happened to being a witch, with a pointed hat and crooked nose? Those days your Uncle was still married to a lovely lady who shared my sense of humor, even if I was a Mangiacake. We went to their home that night – your Dad and uncle were to hand out treats while the ladies took out your cousins Trick or Treating. And so I decided to play a funny on the guys. I put on a mask, got on my knees and rang the bell. (I still remember, I had on a pair of tight jeans that made it very tricky – I am so glad I don’t do “tight” anymore), When the guys opened the door, I said, “Trick or Treat” in a little girl voice – of course they did not recognize me – we laughed so hard, I thought I’d pee myself – sorry if I jostled you up a bit but I did not suspect your existence, I swear.