It was a Tuesday afternoon…no wait…maybe a Thursday… it started with a ‘T’… I believe…
The office was quiet, all of us at our cubicle, in our own particular zoo….(or so it seemed), wishing we had opted for the salad at lunch, instead of the pound packing fast food that was to die for tasty but left us feeling drowsy and sluggish.
From down the hall we heard the tinkling, high pitched laughter of the NEW Purchasing Agent copping amusement at the lame jokes our General Manager trotted out ad nauseum…. If she thought that would help her garner a raise or promotion…well, good luck with that…you didn’t break glass ceilings in this male dominated automotive industry… well, unless you could take a fifty year old 400 to 1000 ton press apart and put it back together, able to stamp out metal parts of every shape and size…in five minutes flat… now that would get you noticed….
Suddenly we heard was a short, sharp whimper, then a thud and Bob’s shadow, usually busy behind the frosted glass partition, no longer in site. Those of us closest to the scene, moved cautiously…. poor Bob, (not Bobby, nor Robert, nor Robby)… eyes open and glassy, staring straight up and seeing nothing… the quiet turned to pandemonium… call 911… who knows CPR… Help… give him space… get out of the way…Bob, Bob…Wake up Bob…
Contact Human Resources… the clip board brigade… who are Bob’s next of kin… where is that ambulance… go stand outside and flag them down… get them through the correct entrance so the production workers will continue stamping out parts for our Tier One Customers… They fine us a fortune when we close down their Production line… and Bob wouldn’t like that… no for sure, Bob would be horrified that HE shut down the Customer’s Production Line.
Bob was an enigma.. always polite… prompt, professional… He never discussed his home life… he went to mandatory company parties… solo… turned out he was an only child… his parents were long dead… he was all by himself.
As our Chief Statistician Technician, Bob was a Bank of Information…. not only for the parts we made, but what we needed to create each gadget… he knew every computer, printer, hard drive and how to get them back up and running better than our IT.
Goes without saying, Bob knew every Welding and Staking Machine, all the Presses and which heavy mother of a die made what part in what press. He knew how many bags of coffee would have to be in stock to satisfy the caffeine fiends… even I suspect how many rolls of toilet paper it took to cover usage… Who would we go to to respond to our questions in an unflappable manner that always encouraged and never judged the asker.
Another gift Bob had was Search and Rescue…. sometimes a basket of parts would go missing… not make it to the FG (Finished Goods) shelf where it should be stored but buried with a competitor’s Customers’ inventory… the JIT (Just In Time) Truck was on the docks waiting… time was money… the clock was ticking… the Customer was charging an astronomical wait time… The Shipping Supervisor, cap in hand, had to go to Bob (again), who would go out to the plant, hop on a forklift, ask a few questions and instinctively (it seemed), go to the right corner, move a few bins, and viola… there were the parts… no fuss, no muss, no thanks required…it was his job, Man…
They don’t make them like Bob anymore… okay, okay he was Magna Cum Laude in Mechanical Engineering but he gave so much more than he took. Funny that… how you can know someone more in Death than in life.
It was Bob’s legacy… We soon realized… all management, fellow workers and the whole plant would never quite adjust to a world without him. The company paid for his funeral… they held it on a Saturday so they didn’t have to pay us to attend (I suspect),… His Will split any assets to his favorite charities…Wildlife and Wild Horses Associations), I understand…. least way, none of us prospered.
After much deliberation and and consensus (of course), it was decided to blow a hole in the wall where Bob’s cubicle once housed the Engine of our Company…. A New Age Pyramid Power extension was created with a glassed in year round patio, and funky coloured couches, tables and chairs, for all the employees to chill. In one corner is a simple stone pedestal that reads: In Memory of Bob… (not Bobby, nor Robert, nor Robby – no last name necessary). Like… Bob was the Gift that kept on Giving… to his WP (Workplace).
Oh, and that NEW Purchasing Agent… she quit shortly after… guess she wasn’t so keen on the General Manager’s lame jokes…. or maybe she was Risk Averse and decided that dying on the job wasn’t part of her Bucket List….
All by myself….Don’t make me be… All by myself… Anymore… (Paraphrase Eric Carmen)
